There are lots of variables contributing to your underemployment. It didn’t happen overnight. We know you’ve already beat yourself up plenty for not having the greatest job, so we thought we would remind you, it’s not all your fault. It really isn’t.
Maybe you deserve some of the blame. I mean, nobody forced you to go all in on the Art History degree. But hey, no degree is really safe anymore in these fun loving times of economic uncertainty and dramatic instability. So we think it’s only right to point fingers at other reasons you find yourself in a job that bores you to tears, and pays dick for all. The following are our kind of tongue in cheek, maybe, not really, but probably yes, we mean it for sure, five people and things you can blame for your underemployment besides yourself.
It sucks right now. Wait, scratch that. It blows. Anyone telling you our economy is robust or that it’s never been better is A. full of shit or/and B. an asshole, who is one of the few victors in today’s winner take all, loser eats ass, economy. Due to outsourcing, stagnating wages, loss of worker’s rights, automation, disappearing jobs, and vanishing industries, your battleship was sunk before you even started playing the game.
Yes, jobs are available, but most of them are low paying and low skilled. Millions of well educated, highly skilled people can’t get a decent job. It’s not your fault the rich are getting richer. You just weren’t born to the right parents. You know, the kind that lend their progeny a small loan of a million dollars so they can start their own company. Which leads us to our next people you can blame.
Yes, they provided you with a home, food, clothes, and love. But they kept you in the dark on the way the world truly operates when you’re an adult. It ain’t Mickey Mouse Club, that’s for sure. “Shit is all fucked up” as my seven year old niece is fond of saying.
Simply put, your parents didn’t kick your ass enough. They didn’t think they needed to. They thought the world would be your oyster, like it was theirs when they were your age. For that reason, they trusted you to find your own way.
This just in: Your parent’s were not going through the same economic conditions you are now. The economic conditions thrusting you into one terrible job after another. So next time you see your parents, remind them, you are a reflection of them, and then go upstairs to your room and write them this month’s rent check.
Absolutely. Your friends deserve a nice portion of blame for your underemployment. Those fuckers who were cheering you on in college to finish your fifth straight beer bong, did not give a shit about your professional future. They wanted you for their amusement and good times.
Let me ask you- Are you in the famed Skull and Bones Association? The Yale, secret organization whose membership is basically all the power players in the world. No? Well that’s too bad, because those fuckers didn’t need to do jack shit to earn their careers. See earlier about being born to the “right parents.” “Right,” being, “rich as fuck.” Since you’re not in Skull and Bones, all your college partying with your friends may have cost you.
Also, it’s a known fact: friends hate seeing their friends succeed. Think about it. Deep down, don’t you hate seeing your friends do well if you aren’t? Of course you do. We all love it when our friends fail!!! Now man up, find Jim from your sophomore year who told you the future would work itself out, and kick him squarely in the balls.
They taught you the school subjects, applauded your creativity, and may have even given you a gold star or two. What they didn’t teach you- none of them, was anything about life outside of school. Was it their responsibility? Well, not really, but this is about blaming others, so let’s say….yes. Even if it isn’t their fault, at the very least, your hot teacher could have had an affair with you. Then your memories of high school would only be terrible instead of merely horrific.
Because they are an excellent scapegoat for every problem, we would be remiss not to use them for our list. While government, when run with the needs of all the people in mind, has terrific attributes, the truth is, our government has put its lot in with the super rich. Here, this clip explains it better than I can.